Four steps
- Draft 70–100 words of action without editing for rhythm.
- Underline the sentence containing the decisive action and reduce it to eight words or fewer.
- Combine two earlier sentences so the approach to the decision becomes slower and more detailed.
- Read the paragraph aloud, cut repeated openings, and place the strongest concrete noun or verb at the end.
Worked example: from flat draft to paced paragraph
Blank starting pointFlat draft: Niko walks through the archive, hears the alarm, finds the file, and takes it.
After Step 1Niko moved between the shelves. The alarm began ringing. He looked for box 41. He saw it above him. He pulled over a ladder. He climbed. He opened the box. He found his name on a file. He took it.
After Step 2Decisive sentence: He stole his own file.
After Step 3Slow the approach: While the alarm rang above the locked exit, Niko dragged the ladder beneath shelf 41 and climbed toward the only box marked with tomorrow’s date.
After Step 4 — finished versionWhile the alarm rang above the locked exit, Niko dragged the ladder beneath shelf 41 and climbed toward the only box marked with tomorrow’s date. Dust broke beneath his fingers. Inside lay a photograph, an unsigned confession, and a folder bearing his full name. Footsteps struck the stairs. Niko left the photograph and the confession where they were. He stole his own file.